Posted on by MyBeautifulMigraine

Crescent moon migraine morning

And there it is this morning… it’s a crescent shape in my left frontal forehead. A crescent moon shape of pain… a rumbling brawl that will not be silenced; complaining, grumbling, muttering… demanding to be noticed. And so, yes, I acknowledge you, Migraine. The crescent slides down into my left eye. There it is: Chronic Migraine.  I admit it to myself again that – verily – I do have Chronic Migraine. We forever walk hand-in-hand. Old frenemies; recognizing each other every day. Each day the sun rises, arcs across the sky, and sets, as the moon follows. There are no holidays. There are no resets. There are no interruptions… our relationship is built on rock and resolve. We are in this body – and share this life together. There is no cure for Chronic Migraine.

I’m listening to you crescent moon. I hear you. When I close my eyes… when I open them… I hear you. And I recognize and know you.

It is time for me to be honest, and it is time for migraine medication. I’ve moved back to my prison bed… supine pose… I took a maxalt with Marc’s assist because he is just that awesome and I love him dearly with my whole soul.

And the riddles start immediately: will the medicine work on crescent moon? If I stop here, right now… supine in my prison bed, resting, releasing every tenion in my Chronic Migraine body; a state of intentional repose… will the maxalt start to erase the constant fierce ache slipping into my eye? Will it do anything? Will my body just ignore the maxalt? Or will it stand at attention, metabolize and perform as it is intended, and silence the crescent? Always the same riddles. It’s boring. It’s tedious. It’s stupid. It’s repetitive. It’s the same old story and just a new day.

As I bring this small post to a close (keeping only one eye open and intentionally reslaxing), I can report that the crescent is quieting. For now, at this time, maxalt is working. 🌙 And that is a wonderful, wonderful thing.

Posted on by MyBeautifulMigraine

Holy Migraine… and Painsomnia!

You know those migraines that remind you that you’re truly a migraineur? Like, all along you’ve been getting regular migraines and suddenly a whopper imbeds itself in your brain? And you have a sudden realization: Damn, Batman, I really am a Chronic Migraineur!

Today’s has been swinging with a gut punch all the day long: I woke at about 11 am with her. She’s taken state in my right frontal lobe – deep. I’ve had a myriad of well-wishes: Is your botox working yet? (Administered 5 days ago, 37 days late of treatment date). And it makes me feel awfully sad to answer honestly: Thank you so much for asking, but, nah, my head is just a bear and botox normally takes a week or two to “kick in,” and I’m so late on treatment that I don’t anticipate I’ll get the same kind of response as usual… botox is cumulative; I’ve got to get into normal on-time treatment, so I anticipate I won’t see real relief until closer to my next treatment in September, God willing. It is genuinely touching that so many people have followed my trials and followed my advocacy. So very heartwarming. The world is full of good people and kind souls.

I stayed in bed today. I changed my head ice wraps every hour. I rotated my medications, but did not overload. I found the most relief with that one med we Chronic Cats are not supposed to use anymore due to high incidence of possibly causing rebound migraine.

But darn it all, if Fioricet isn’t the most reliable medication! I can count on it, working almost 90% of the time! Maxalt works about 55%, Ubrevly about 60%, Reyvow (still assessing this one since I haven’t used it that long), about 60%.

When I had some relief, I was able to work on baby shower plans, help my husband with honey-do items, and cut his hair! Saucy!

Today’s migraine has been brought to me by extreme weather heat, allergies, and a fun 1.5 hour dinner last night with friends in a restaurant! My husband and I are working intentionally to foster our relationships with dear friends: not only are our friendships too precious not to nurture, but it gives me the amazing treat of dressing up like a human being, relishing our Empty Nest phase, socializing and enjoying a nice meal – the leftovers I can eat for days! Such a major WIN for a Chronic!

I also had most of a gorgeous frozen strawberry margarita – and alcohol certainly makes my migraine events worse.

So now… it’s 4 am and I cannot sleep due to Painsomnia… I’ve taken appropriate medication, have my green light on, and I’ve fired up the Cefaly. Hoping this will put me to sleep… healing sleep.

And I will probably over sleep tomorrow. My husband will wake up at 8, feed the dogs, make coffee, get ready, and give my head a tiny kiss before he heads out to a day in the office for work. I’ll find a cool cup of coffee on my night table when I finally open my eyes and rub away sleep. He is truly the best!

Will I wake up without migraine tomorrow at about 11 am? Will I be able to get dressed and made up while enjoying my favorite podcast? Will I be able to work my biz a little? Work on the baby shower a little? Clean the house a little? Oh what a glorious accomplishment that would be!!!😍 With or without migraine, that would be glorious to have the energy to be that productive!

I’m going to sign off and try to sleep with my zinging and intensly tingling Cefaly and try to sleep now! The TV is on with only the faintest white background noise, and a #BOTOXforChronicMigraine commercial was just played. Oh, the very ironic anecdotes of my Chronic Life!

Peace and love to all who struggle daily! Keep fighting for a Life to Live!

Posted on by MyBeautifulMigraine

The DISSERVICE to Addiction

Addiction is real. A real mental disorder that deserves care and understanding and action. But this present US govt stance on Opiates (and growing number of other drug classss), is a terrible disservice done to Addiction, Tools of dealing with Pain, Chronic Pain – EVERYONE.

TWOLA, 4/22

Opiates and other medications are simply tools. They are not killers, they are not evil, and everyone reacts very differently to medications. Allowing our US legislators free reign to make laws regarding these tools, we invite individuals who know NOTHING about Healthcare our own individual health care into our chart, our PRIVATE lives. No no no no no!

I am not unsympathetic to human beings who have lost their lives to opiates – in whatever their capacity – illegal fentanyl, overdosing on prescriptions, etc. Every loss of life is tragic. There is a process where our country could be more careful with opiates. But it’s a no-go inserting government into a patient-doctor relationship. My doctor and I know the tools to care for my health. The US legislator does NOT.

To me, there is only a Libertarian POV for medical care. Not everyone is an Addict. The population should not be scared to death about treating temporary or chronic pain. Doctors’ licensing shouldn’t be threatened for good and appropriate healthcare. The government does not belong in between me and my physician.

I cannot wait for the pendulum to sway back to Sanity. Get the government OUT of my healthcare!

TWOLA, 4/22 There are SO many questions about this info blurb. “Opiates kill more than 136 Americans a day” – Suicide? Illegal opiates? Addiction? Accidental overdose? Poisoning?

Addiction is real. It is NOT the same thing as Dependence. Not everyone is even on the spectrum of Addiction potential! Treating a medication as an evil thing is just dumb; medication is a tool. And mistreating temporary and chronic pain inadequately because of a creation of an Opiate War is criminal. Advocate for genuine, positive, individual, wellness-oriented, collaborative patient healthcare.

#PatientsNotAddicts, #Chronicillness, #ChronicMigraine, #ChronicPain #CMAware, #SpeakYourMigraine, #opiatewar, #AddictionVSDependency, #waronopiates, #MedicineIsATool, #GovernmentOUTofmyHealthcare, #DoctorPatientHealthcare, #EndtheOpiateWar, #KeepIllegalFentanylOUT, #getoutofmyhealthcare, #Libertarian

Do I look sick? I am a Face of terrible & life-changing Chronic Illness 💜