This has been a difficult cycle/phase. I’m sure starting with the holidays in November, and cedar season, following with the most wonderful event of our son’s wedding in early January. That took me a solid 4 weeks to recover. Which, while worth every minute, is a ridiculous amount of time.
With Headache on the Hill last week, I feel I’m still in recovery cycle… maybe another week? The weather is rainy and gross. My thyroid numbers are finally stable from my Emgality flop last Spring.
I’m puttering along… flaring with migraine or RA everyday. Pain, pain, pain, more pain, light sensitivity, nausea, hot flash, pain, pain, lethargy, worse lethargy. Opressive feelings of guilt, inadequacy, uselessness, burden to those I love. Facing the big question: do I have enough energy to shower? Wash my hair? Put on clothes or makeup? It’s terribly depressing and sad that my life has shrunk to the size of a tiny fishbowl. Just a fish, swimming in my bowl, ready to flip belly-up and float.
Trying to push through, rest as much as I can, hide as much of my disabilities as I can – because they are so embarrassing. Trying to focus on the important things and the good moments. Moments. It’s all life is… those moments.
November, December, January, February… bust. Maybe March will be better? I’m sure March will be better. 🌞 Or maybe April…?🌞🌞
djk #MyBeautifulMigraine #invisibleillness